Yankees Suck
Yankees Suck Yankees Suck

March 31, 2004

Yanks' "Must Win"

By lefty

Umpire Joe West ended Alex Rodriquez's historic first Yankee at bat with a call of "Strike Three." Striding back to the dugout A-Rod must have been thinking, "Bad call, but no big deal, I've struck out before. I'll get him next time." But half a world away, at the Florida family compound the horses from the neighboring stud farm were spooked by the infuriated roar bellowed by the man who signs A-Rod's obscene paycheck. Nine innings later, after a humiliating 8 to 3 loss to one of the poorest teams in baseball, the Yankees were at a place they didn't think would come until October. Game two of the Yankees 2004 season suddenly became a "Must Win."

"If we lose tomorrow, we won't be in a 747 going home, it will be B & O, the Baltimore & Ohio Railroad," Yankees special advisor, Reggie Jackson, said in Jack Curry's story in The New York Times. "You lose that and we'll go straight to New York," Jackson said in his first officially recorded advice to the team this season. Good advice Reggie. In the same story, A-Rod was also quoted as comparing the game to a "side show."

(A-Rod, I love ya, but buddy, download a pirated version of Bachman-Turner Overdive's, "You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet.")

Steinbrenner issued a statement from his armchair in Florida after the Yankees' first loss. Mark Hill of the New York Post quotes from the statement and explains how "the boss" is more interested in "Tommy Tune" than A-Rod. Right.

Also reported in the Times story by Mr. Curry, plush towels were delivered to the visiting team's clubhouse a few hours before game time. The towels reportedly did not have pinstripes, but the Yankees did. Even though they were officially the away team, they got a special dispensation from MLB to wear their home pinstripes.


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