Even I Could be a Yankee
By Jay Monahan
Until I was about 15 years old, I had the notion that I was going to play for a major league baseball team. Oblivious to my then 5-foot, 6-inch, 105-pound frame and .126 junior varsity batting average, I was so overconfident of my blazing speed on the base paths that some scout, sooner-or-later, would be impressed to the point I’d be signed in the 75th round by a team known for drafting lovable losers. I’d eventually shoot up the farm system with ease, earning a spot as a steadfast pinch runner, á la San Diego’s Damien Jackson.
Sure it seemed like a stretch but I’d seen a countless number of talentless hacks called up to the Phillies from the local AAA-affiliate Scranton/Wilkes-Barre Red Barons. But then again, I was a stupid kid — chances are Sisqô was in my CD player at the time.
Eventually, I would throw my professional baseball plans away and trade hip hop for classic rock. But now, a few years later, I see talentless hacks playing for the New York Yankees in the likes of Robinson Cano, Chien-Ming Wang, and Sean Henn. When you see low-potential players jump up to big leagues, it is usually due to a bad team, like the Pirates, or impotent general managers – like the Phillies had back in the mid-to-late 90s, (although I have been questioning Brian Cashman’s abilities after he threw the farm system away,) —or trying to boost your "prospect's" value in the trade market.
With the Yankees lingering eight games out of first place in the basement of the American League East, George Steinbrenner, realizing that New York’s chances of catching up to Baltimore and Boston are slim with an aging pitching staff as out-of-shape as the fat guy who has already began camping outside for Revenge of the Sith tickets, is trying to get his minor leaguers – perhaps more over-rated than his horses – exposure so he can trade their worthless talent for an over-hyped-player-to-be-named-later.
Owners beware: you’re about to make the worst mistake since FOX cut episodes of Arrested Development for the painstakingly awful American Dad.
Pinstripe faithful will label this a conspiracy theory. So be it. But there’s no plausible explanation for Steinbrenner to be playing Cano, Wang, and Henn when he has a payroll of $208 million, aside for bait for younger players to replace the present.
Cano is plaguing the bottom of the Yankee lineup with a batting average just below the [Timo] Perez line at .095. At Triple A Columbus last year, his numbers were equally as disappointing with a .259 batting average and 30 RBIs in over 60 games. Forget the Yankees, why was he playing for the Clippers and not at Double A Trenton?
Wang spend most of the 2004 season at Trenton, where he boasted a mediocre 6-5 record. Henn, with a 19.29 ERA in his only start for New York, pitched only at Trenton last season, where he was 6-8 with a 4.41 ERA. Both have been equally terrible as Yankees, both were rocked by Tampa Bay hitters.
The Yankees contend that the lineup changes are just them trying to find what works. "We didn't like who we were, so we tried something," manager Joe Torre said in an Associated Press article, speaking of the recent additions to the roster. "The way we are playing, we need to see if this will help us."
But look at it. It’s May. None of the players are going to make an impact in the near future. They are having trouble making blockbuster trades because owners want fresh meat and big names. And, come the deadline, the Yankees will be behind Baltimore, Boston, Minnesota, or Chicago for a wild card slot and will need a spare arm and second baseman for a run at it. Put it all together and it makes sense: Steinbrenner is making these youngsters look good. It’s good business, but bad baseball.
This is all getting me to ponder whether or not I should quit writing to play Division III college baseball, because, sooner-or-later Steinbrenner will have ME donning pinstripes.
Other Sources:
TheBaseballCube.com
Associated Press
